Series 6 > McCulloch examinations of the Cambuslang revival (1742) > Volume 6

140
EXAMINATIONS OF PERSONS UNDER SPIRITUAL CONCERN II
it.14 []15 And I was at this time, made with all my heart & soul to accept
of the Lord Jesus Christ in all his Redeeming offices, and to devote & give
up my whole Self, Soul, Body & Spirit, to him to be forthcoming for his
glory, & to be Saved by him in his own way, & to be wholly & for ever his.
Soon after this, Satan charg’d me with & upbraided me with the breach
of all the commands of Gods Law: I was made to take with the charge & to
owne that all this & much more than the Enemy knew, was true; but was
made to fly to Jesus Christ, as my alone City of Refuge, & to take Shelter in
his merits & mediation.
For about two years and a quarter after this, I was much troubled &
persecuted by the wicked temptations [ ]16 of Satan, & firy darts, of blasphemous
thoughts cast into my Soul, putting all into confusion there, & urging me to
throw away all I had met with in dutys, as Delusion. Yet, all along, the Lord
mercifully supported my drooping soul by secret yet powerful supports, &
several gracious words now & then brought home to my heart, that greatly
relieved me, as particularly, that word. For [314/-] a small moment have I
forsaken thee, but with great mercies will I gather thee. In a little wrath have I
hid my face from thee, but with everlasting loving kindness will I have mercy
on thee, saith the Lord thy Redeemer.17 And when my Soul Enemy tempted
me much to make away with my self, or threatned to destroy me, the Lord
made me reject such motions toward Self-Murder with abhorrence, & made
me hope that he would protect me, by that word, No plague shall near thy
dwelling come, no ill shall thee befall!18
At length at a Sacrament-Occasion in Cambuslang in 1745, when hearing
a Sermon on that Text [ ]19 I will betroth thee unto me for ever, yea I will
betroth thee unto me in righteousness & in Judgment, & in loving kindness
& in mercies &c: Hos.2.20 in which Sermon, there were many Invitations
to Backsliders to return, & I knew my self to be one of these, & was made
sensible that these Invitations were directed to me in particular; & was
powerfully brought to fall in with them: In that Sermon, it was said, that
Sometimes when a poor soul would aim at returning to God, & closing with
a Promise, Satan & the unbelief of the misgiving heart, would knock down
with a Threatening: this I had very often found in sad Experience, before
this, in many Influences: but while the Speaker, exhorted to come upon that
gracious Call, at the Close of of the Bible Rev. 22.17 The Spirit & the Bride
14 Rev 2:17.
15 Insertion [‘I know that my Redeemer liveth, &c: and’]: McCulloch.
16 Insertion [‘suggestions’]: McCulloch.
17 15354:7-8.
18 Ps 91:10.
19 Insertion [‘by Mr Gillespy’]: McCulloch.