Collected works > Edinburgh edition, 1894-98 - Works of Robert Louis Stevenson > Volume 28, 1898 - Appendix

THE CHARITY BAZAAR
comical, and necessary articles at less than twice its market
value. {He sounds another flourish.)
The Wife, — This seems a very fair-spoken young man.
The Ingenuous Public {addressing the Tout). — Sir, I am a
man of simple and untutored mind ; but I apprehend that this
sale, of which you give us so glowing a description, is neither
more nor less than a Charity Bazaar ?
The Tout. — Sir, your penetration has not deceived you. m
The Ingenuous Public. — Into which you seek to entice
unwary passengers ?
The Tout. — Such is my office.
The Ingenuous Public. — But is not a Charity Bazaar, Sir,
a place where, for ulterior purposes, amateur goods are sold
at a price above their market value ?
The Tout. — I perceive you are no novice. Let us sit down,
all three, upon the doorsteps, and reason this matter at length.
The position is a little conspicuous, but airy and convenient.
{The Tout seats himself on the second step, the Ingenuous
Public and his Wife to right and left of him, one step
below.)
The Tout. — Shopping is one of the dearest pleasures of the
human heart.
The Wife. — Indeed, Sir, and that it is.
The Tout. — The choice of articles, apart from their useful-
ness, is an appetising occupation, and to exchange bald, uniform
shillings for a fine big, figurative knick-knack, such as a wind-
mill, a gross of green spectacles, or a cocked hat, gives us
a direct and emphatic sense of gain. We have had many
shillings before, as good as these ; but this is the first time we
have possessed a windmill. Upon these principles of human
nature, Sir, is based the theory of the Charity Bazaar. People
were doubtless charitably disposed. The problem was to make
the exercise of charity entertaining in itself — you follow me,
Madam? — and in the Charity Bazaar a satisfactory solution
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