Blair Collection > Rhys Lewis, minister of Bethel

RHYS LEWIS. 331
was clear my presence disturbed the sufferer. But I respect-
fully declined. I had left him, once, when I ought not, and I
■was not going to do so again. It was hard, indeed, on me.
My heart bled with pity for the best, tenderest, godliest man I
had ever known. It was in my power to set his mind at rest
by revealing his desire ; and it was most important to me per-
sonally that I should do so, for my future, to a great extent,
depended upon it. But I dared not do this without throwing
suspicion upon my motives. Silently and earnestly I prayed
that my master might have strength to speak ; but every
minute, as it were, bore him farther away, and diminished our
hope of his ever again being able to commune with us. "With
much trouble we got him to bed, where every possible means
were used to restore him, but without avail. As I said, he had
not wholly lost the use of his right arm. I sat by the bedside,
m.y hand in his. He lay for hours, as if in happy sleep, only,
when I tried to withdraw my hand, he turned uneasily. The
doctor, saying he might remain in that state for days, went
away, promising to return in the morning. Miss Hughes,
who was persuaded to retire to rest, seeing she could do no-
thing for her brother, had procured an experienced nurse to
stay up with me to watch the sick man. The weather was
warm, the place still, and presently the " experienced nurse"
fell fast asleep. Dr. Bennett had not the slightest hope of my
dear old master's recovery; neither, any longer, had I, al-
though I earnestly prayed God— not with any selfish purpose
— that his tongue might be loosened, were it only for a minute.
"Was I heard ? If I said yes, who would believe me ? I had
been watching an hour, for two hours, and the " experienced
nurse " sleeping for exactly the same space of time. The
breathings of my beloved old benefactor were so light and soft,
that I feared he had passed. I gently let go his hand. He awoke,
peacefully as a child in its cot, looked at me, and said— well, I
never repeated those few words to any living soul ; because I
thought Doctor Bennett might pronounce the thing impos-
sible, or that I had been dreaming ; while others might say I
had a selfish motive in telling the story ; and others that the
whole was but animal magnetism. It matters not in the least,
by this time. I know this much— I made no use of his words