Series 1 > Diary of Sir Archibald Johnston of Wariston 1632-1639

MEMENTO QUAMD1U VIVAS
135
1. by our affection and inclination, 2. by our gifts. Then I
spend al the afternoone in the Scheins long aylay to try by
both quhither I sould apply myselth to the ministerie or to
the laues; and, first, I fand indeed that I respected mor and
honored in my mynd the first mor nor the last, hot that ever
my affection and resolution caryed me to the last, both becaus
I sau my mynd could not be ever bent on religious exercices,
bot faynted if it wer not somtymes diverted by wordly occa¬
sions, as also becaus I durst not tak the burden of ma1 saules
nor myne auine, of quhilk alone I fand verrie difficultly that
I could work out its salvation in fear and trimbling ; and so I
fand that ever my inclination was to serve God in this, fearing
as it wer somtymes least I sould be diverted thairfra to another.
And, secondly, I fand my gifts not so fitted for the first as for
the last, becaus my gift is rayther dialectik nor didaktical,
fitter for disputing pro and contra nor for teatching solid
grounds; then, becaus neyther my invention, jugement, nor
memorie was for handling of so deape mysteries, and that, to
the jugement of al cheifly M. A. Sc.2 I halve ane evil scraiped
tounge and so wald halve no utterance at al in preaching, for
indeed I was never ane good linguist eyther in Scots, Frensch,
or Latin; bot cheifly seing the main poynt of that calling
consist in catechysing, quherof I am utterly uncapable in
respect of my natural haistines, kankerdnes, and impatience,
and that reason mooved Mr. R. Burnat to disuade me from it;
as also nou I but to spend 3 or 4 year or ever I wald be aible
for ane poulpit; bot as for the laues both my affection, my ygli 70 ^
continuat resolution since my bairnehoode, my plying of my
studies to that end, the manifold occasions of furthering me in
it, my gifts being disputative naturally fitted for it, and cheifly
this warrand of the Apostle comanding me to remaine in the My choyse of
calling quhairin I was called,! Corinth. 7 c. 20 v., Boltons, fanUesalling the
Pareus,3 Perquins, on that text, al exhorting to avrap/teiav and
reprooving ane unnecessar or rasch chainge of calling, mutch
1 More. 2 Mr. Archibald Scaldee.
s David Pareus, an eminent Professor of Divinity at Heidelberg. A notice
of his life is given in Fuller, p. 577. His Opera Theologica Exegetica, in three
folio volumes, was published in 1628-1650.