Series 1 > Diary of Sir Archibald Johnston of Wariston 1632-1639

MEMENTO QUAMDIU VIVAS
105
al my sinnes unto God, first by the order of the comandements,
nixt by the order of my lyf tyme, and that with many tears
proceiding from greif for bygons and fear of falling in them
againe; then on my knees I applied first to myselth in Gods
sight the confessions of Daniel 9 c.; of Nehemiah 1 c., also 9 c.;
of Ezra, 9 c.; of David, 51 Ps.; of Jeremiah, Lamenta:; then,
after long prayer in the mediation of Chryst to God the Fayther
for pardon, then I read and folloued the direction of Bifeild his
foort rule in his first treatise concerning the application of the
promises unto me in particular. Having read particularly al the
passages quherin they wer contained I prostrat myselth and
laid them in braid band 1 befor the Lord, craiving ardently in
the mediation of Chryst that he wald remember thir words
quheron he maid me his unworthy servant for to hoope and to
rest, 119 Ps. 49 v., and that he wald be wealpleased mor and
mor to seale up my fayth in them by the Sprite of promise.
Then I voued unto God every day once for to meditate upon on
chapter of Bifields catologe of sinnes until I ended him. Then
I remembred that, befor my manage, in Foulden I read Bifields
first treatise, and also quhen I was sick befor my affliction
I was reading over the Rules of ane holy lyfe. He comforted
me mutch by giving as ane singe infallible of true repentance
to desyre as heartyly to forsaik sinne as to desyre that God
sould forgive it, for then I fell doune on my knees and took
God to witnes that I prayed ever as instantly, yea mor, for to be
strenthened to quyte my dearest darling sinnes as for not to
haive them imputed unto me ; yea the fear of falling in sinne
againe, and so of offending ane reconciled God, greiveth me
mor nor the fear of hell fyre for bygones; the act of sinning is
mor odious [nor] the sense of any punischment is to my
wakned saule.
On Saturday morning, al the way, as I went be the Queens
ferry to Kircadie, my mynd was in ane continual ejaculations
unto the Lord, and in meditation first of thy affliction, quher-
of God’s word at Isleworth, in Middlesex : London, 1625. The many subjects
referred to in the Diary as Bifield’s are contained in the above work.
1 Fully exposed them. Corn laid out in the harvest field, on the band, but not
bound, is said to be lying in braid band. ‘ To be laid in braid band,’ meta¬
phorically, ‘to be fully exposed.’—Jamieson.