Collected works > Edinburgh edition, 1894-98 - Works of Robert Louis Stevenson > Volume 11, 1895 - Miscellanies, Volume III

'VIRGINIBUS PUERISQUE'
How then, seeing we are driven to the hypothesis
that people choose in comparatively cold blood, how
is it they choose so well ? One is almost tempted
to hint that it does not much matter whom you
marry ; that, in fact, marriage is a subjective affec-
tion, and if you have made up your mind to it, and
once talked yourself fairly over, you could ' pull it
through ' with anybody. But even if we take matri-
mony at its lowest, even if we regard it as no more
than a sort of friendship recognised by the police,
there must be degrees in the freedom and sympathy
realised, and some principle to guide simple folk in
their selection. Now what should this principle be ?
Are there no more definite rules than are to be
found in the Prayer-book ? Law and religion for-
bid the banns on the ground of propinquity or con-
sanguinity ; society steps in to separate classes ; and
in all this most critical matter, has common sense,
has wisdom, never a word to say ? In the absence
of more magisterial teaching, let us talk it over be-
tween friends : even a few guesses may be of interest
to youths and maidens.
In all that concerns eating and drinking, company,
climate, and ways of life, community of taste is to
be sought for. It would be trying, for instance, to
keep bed and board with an early riser or a vege-
tarian. In matters of art and intellect, I believe it
is of no consequence. Certainly it is of none in the
companionships of men, who will dine more readily
with one who has a good heart, a good cellar, and
a humorous tongue, than with another who shares
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