New Spalding Club > Records of Invercauld MDXLVII - MDCCCXXVIII [1547- 1828]

MONALTRIE PAPERS. 4I9
Sir Jas. for his having better success than me, for I heartily wish he had
got more as I am sure he has need of it, but I mention it only to show
how I have been used myself; whether that has been owing to my not
having so good interest as he, or if it has proceeded from the misrepresent-
ations of Malicious people is more than I can tell ; but what ever be the
reason I am the Sufferer. The following occurrence makes one suspect
the latter, and I own it gives me a good deal of concern, since [chancing]
to be in a company with one concerned in the Treasury, and upon his
saying that it was a shame I should be kept prisoner and not gett money
to subsist me, the other made ansure that I lived as well as either of them
and stood in no need of money. This is not only false in fact, but it is
so improbable and carrys such an appearance of the strongest malice in
the first authors that I am surprised any man of character, as the one who
said so certainly is, should have either repeated or given the least credit
to it ; but his informers, be who they will, deserve other epithets than I
either chuse to bestow here or give you the trouble of reading ; for I
assure you it is so far on the other extream that I have been often for
these two years reduced to a very small sum and often to a few shillings
without knowing when or where to be supplied with more, besides being
obliged to borrow where ever I could get any and to run in debt to
tradesmen and others from whom I had necessaries, and all this notwitli-
standing of what some friends were pleased to advance me, which I look
upon as debts of honour if ever I be able to repay them. But supposing
all that's alledged were true, is that any reason for keeping me to be a
burden on my friends, some of whom have ill sparing anything considering
what they advanced for me when I was under Close Confinement, and
yett had they not given some assistance since I came here, I might have
starved in the midst of plenty for others from whom I had reason to
expect a competant Subsistance while here? This I could easily enlarge
upon, but am afraid I shall without that far exceed my desired brevity.
I own that, for near a year after I came into this countrie, I may say I
had some enjoyment in life ; it was an agreeable retirement from the
hurry of a great city, the Countrie itself is pleasant and I mett with some
very hospitable and civill people in it, I had a little money in my pocket
and nothing to ask of anybody, I had an opportunity of seeing how
improvements and farming were carried on here, and I was in hopes some
time or other of prevailling with those in my own Countrie to follow their
example, and with all this I enjoyed a tolerable good state of health.
But when money began to fail and my applications were fruitless and I
was seized with a troublesome and obstinate ague with all the other
inconveniences that have followed, things have ever since wore a quite
different face, and yett I have endeavoured all along, whether prudently
or not, I shall not say, to conceal my circumstances from the World as
much as I could, and I put on all outward appearence of Contentment