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Broaside ballad entitled 'The Burntisland Catechisme' |
TranscriptionTHE BURNT ISLAND CATECHISME. Ques. WHy must our Councellors be fools ? Ans.'Cause then they're sittest to be tools . Q. And what supplies their want of sense ? A. Their want of bread and Conscience. Q. Why is it fitt they shou'd be poor ? A. 'Cause then a Bribe prevails the more. Q. And why is Conscience laid aside ? A. Least it officiously upbraid. Q. Yet dont they still pretend to have it ? A. Yes but in vain , for none belive it. Q. Why fancy they their Smith is wife ? A. Because they know not what he says . Q. How palliats he his Ignorance ? A. With bold insulting arrogance. Q. What qualifies him for his trust ? A. An extraordinary thrist. Q. How is't that thrist do'th make him fit ? A. It makes him drinke with appetite . Q. Do'th drinking then advance their cause ? A. More than a thousand useless Laws. Q. Why are the Laws by them despis'd ? A. 'Cause Troop their Lawier so advis'd. Q. How do'th our learned Clerk behave ? A. Like a religious Crasty knave . Q. What makes his speech a mistery ? A. Bombast, Pedantick sophistry. Q. What service hath he done the Town ? A. He's made its Credite like his own. Q. Why is our Priest a politician ? A. 'Cause he came here on that Condition. Q. Who sent him here, and to what end? A. Rothes, his stubborn foes to bend. Q. How Combates he his Lordships foes ? A. With wrested texts, instead of blows. Q. How do'th he discipline his friends ? A. He teaches them to serve his ends. Q. Hath he for that a Gospel licence ? A. No, but he says he's one from Conscience. Q. What's his reward, for all this toil ? A. His stipend, and my Lord's good will. Q. How gratifies my Lord, the reft ? A. With a sew Guineas and a feast. Q. How do'th he warm their Cooling zeal ? A. With sowr wine, punch and bottled ale. Q. Why do'th his Lordship court them so ? A. For's use, as men their misses do. Q. What must they then at last expect ? A. Their nighbour's scorn, and Lords neglect.
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Probable date of publication:
1720- shelfmark: RB.I.106(109)
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