Transcription
NEW INVENTED Act of Parliament, FOR THE BENEFIT OF YOUNG MEN, OLD MEN, MAIDS, WIVES, WIDOWS, OLD MAIDS, BACHELORS, &c, At a Meeting of several Ladies and Gentlemen of this Town, held for the better Management and conduct- ing Order and Regularity in Society, Mr STEADY in the Chair, the following Resolutions were passed;- RESOLVED, 1st.-That no lady shall wear a bonnet more than one yard ronnd ; and no more than two to be allowed to walk arm in arm together, so that they may not obstruct tae way, (to prevent persons being turned off the pavement by the said bonnets) under the penaly of five pounds. 2-That any lady not paying the above penalty when called upon, or should any gentleman be blown into the gutter by the wind of her bonnet, she shall be sent to the tread-mill for three months, and to fan the mill round with bonnets. 3.-That no ware-house clerk, counter hopper, chim- ney sweep, journeyman, apprentice, or dandy, shall shall smoke a cigar in the street before six o'clock in the morning, or after ten in the evening : for every such of- fence, to grind logwood on the tread-mill for three months. 4-That every working man shall 'be at liberty to smoke on his way home, after work in the evening, pro- viding he puffs no one's eyes out. 5.-That no old maid wife, or widow woman, shall take more than a pound of snuff in one week, and not to take more than one pinch during hours of cooking, for fear of dropping it from their nose into the gravey, under the penalty of not having another pinch for one month. 6.-That any man shall be at liberty to beat his wife, provided she deserves it, with any weapon not smaller than a broom-stick, not softer than a kitchen poker, pro- vided he does not commit murder, but break as many bones as he pleases. Any woman not likeing this treat- ment, shal be at liberty to leave her husband, by articles of agreement, drawn up and signed in the presence of the next door neighbour, she taking the children and goods; and further, that she also take with her two black eyes, if her husband thinks her deserving of the same. 7.-That any washer-woman, or any woman going out to daily work, shall keep one-half of her earnings, and the other half shall be given to her lord and master, for drinking money. 8-That any man coming home drung, shall be care- fully put to bed by his wife, she being at liberty to pick his pocket, and have a gill of whisky for her trouble. 9 That a man and his wife must not get drunk at one time, for fear of fire, as two drunken people in one house is contrary to the act. l0.-That every bachelor, at the age of forty, be com- pelled to keep two wives, to make up for lost time: In neglecting so to do, he shall pay a fine of five pounds, to the poorest couple in the parish. 11 .-That no old maid be permitted to keep more than one dozen of lap-dogs, cats, or parrots, to the annoyance of the neighbourhood, but to use every lawful means in her power to procure a husband; but if she can prove to the satisfaction of the Court, that she has already done so without success, then the Court shall be bound to provide her a sleeping partner during the cold nights of winter. 12.-That no married woman shall lie snoring lu her bed after seven o'clock in the morning, with the fire ont, and the breakfast not ready, under the penalty of being tied to her bed for a fortnight. 13-Any man marrying a woman, and not being able to accomplish the duties of matrimony, the wife shall be empowered to employ a journeyman; the husband pre- suming to grumble, shall be dipped three times a-day in a horse pond, till his wife prove in the family way. SANDERSON, Printer. High Street Edinburgh.
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Probable period of publication:
1830-1839 shelfmark: L.C.Fol.74(127)
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