Temperance > Autobiography and personal recollections of John B. Gough

VIOLATION OF THE PLEDGE.
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felt at the moment, it would be impossible for me to de¬
scribe. Euin, inevitable ruin, stared me in the face. By
one rash and inconsiderate act, I had undone the work of
months, betrayed the confidence reposed in me by friends,
and blasted every hope for the future. To say that 1 felt
miserable, would only give a faint idea of my state. For
five months I had battled with my enemy, and defied him
when he appeared armed with all his terrors; but now,
when I fondly fancied him a conquered foe, and had sung
in the broad face of day my paeans of victory to hundreds
and thousands of listeners, he had craftily wrought my
downfall. I was like some bark,
“ Which stood the storm when winds were rough,
But in a sunny hour, fell off;
Like ships that have gone down at sea
When heaven was all tranquillity.”
My accursed appetite, too, which I deemed eradicated,
I found had only slept; the single glass I had taken,
roused my powerful and now successful enemy. I argued
with myself that as I had made one false step, matters
could not be made worse by taking another. So, yielding
to temptation, I swallowed three or four more potations,
and slept that night at the h6tel.
With the morning, reflection came; and fearful, indeed,
appeared to me my situation. Without drinking again,
I started in the cars for Newburyport, painfully feeling
but not exhibiting any signs of having indulged in the
intemperate cup on the previous evening.
At Newburyport an unlooked-for trial awaited me,—I
was invited to speak for the temperance society there. I
felt that 1 had no claim now to be heard, although I bit¬
terly repented my retrograde movement; but at length I
consented to speak, and did so, both on the Sunday and
the following Monday. To Worcester I dreaded return-